The Twub ‘tribe’ or ‘label’ helps me keep it cute and I invite whoever is reading this to keep it cute with their own tribe. You are a strong person that deserves to feel amazing. Brand yourself before taking the label others impose on you. If there’s anything I’ve learnt from dealing with my personal demons, it’s the power of taking control of your identity. The twub tribe is something I’ve created, it’s for me – and whoever else feels twinkylicious with a pinch of cub couture. Identifying under my own label makes me feel like I’m standing out in some way, whilst remaining part of the community – whether I have guys gawking at my underwear pics or not. I’d identify as a twub on and offline, and for me, having a tribe that I feel I sit comfortably within, helps me navigate the minefield of ‘gay twitter’ or being #instagay on Instagram. Especially for a millenial living in the social media age where hours can be lost browsing and swiping through the lives of others. On the flip side, I love being a member of the LGBTI community, but sometimes there are those who are keen to point out our flaws. Well, it can be really difficult to take in. Looking at yourself through a fine-sequined magnifying glass and not liking what you see…. However, I’ve recently come to the realisation that if choosing to identify as a certain label helps lessen social anxiety, boosts one’s mental well being, whether it be superficial or not, own that label and throw out the receipt!Īnxiety within the LGBTI community is a real problem. I’ve often questioned anyone that takes them too seriously. I’ve never actually been a major fan of labels.
What good does that actually achieve? The less I focus on what everyone else is doing, and focus on my own self development, the better and more confident I feel.
From my own experiences, I end up feeding a negative thought process when I compare myself to others on the scene.
It wasn’t until I realized that to feel more comfortable within a community, you sometimes have to mentally distance yourself and not constantly be comparing yourself to others. It means not bowing down to fit into how the world wants to define me.įor years, I felt isolated from the gay community because I didn’t have that gay perfect body and I wasn’t ‘Masc4Masc’: a term that still makes me gag. That includes how I identify and my personal branding. I put myself in those jokey situations because I’ve developed the confidence to be able to take control of how I want the world to see me. Don’t get me wrong, I’m still the punchline of most jokes, but it’s now my own choice. This deterred me from engaging in social situations for years because of the anxiety it caused. Growing up, I was the overweight camp kid that was often the punchline of everyone’s joke at school. Today I find it empowering, but it wasn’t always this way. It is possible to feel sexy as a ‘curvy’ young man, whilst simultaneously poking fun at gay culture by making up tribes by using funny words like twub. ‘Growing up, I was the overweight camp kid’ Identifying as a twub enables me to feel close to the two tribes I most identify with, and not the ones I’m told to identify with. I’ve created the twub tribe for myself because it helps me feel closer to the gay community. Now, I know what you’re thinking if you’ve stuck with me this far: Is this boy for real? Not another gay tribe to add to the list! However … just hear me out. Anyone that follows me will know I like my weird Twitter handles, but this particular handle is probably the most accurate I’ve ever had and was the easiest to swallow (stop it!). What do you get when you mix both neighbouring tribes together?Ī couple of weeks ago, I changed my Twitter title to incorporate the word ‘Twub’. The urban dictionary defines a ‘Twink’ as ‘an attractive, boyish-looking, young gay man.’ It defines a ‘Cub’ as ‘a young, husky, hairy gay man.